Dad's Words

“I’m so proud,” Bobby said the day Joshua was born. “He’s perfect. He has my hands. I bet he’ll play music someday.”

Bobby did as much for his son as I did. He diapered, bathed, fed, rocked and sang to him. Josh was a fussy baby and there were lots of nights no one slept. We didn’t have any idea that he was sick.

Joshua was diagnosed at nine months old. Bobby and I stayed in the hospital nine days with him. It was tough seeing an IV in the side of your baby’s head and watching his tiny fingers getting pricked every few hours. Bobby even had to learn to put the mg tube through Josh’s nose into his stomach in case we would choose to use the pump drip at night. But we never did this. We took turns with the corn starch feeds.

They were as close as a dad and son could be. They went fishing and hunting together. Bobby took Josh to T ball practice and attended every game he could. They loved watching movies and eating popcorn. As Josh grew older they even enjoyed mowing grass and weed eating with one another.

Bobby sat up many a night with a fevered Josh. We even had to make some middle of the night trips to the ER.

I’ll never forget the time we were shopping at Wal Mart. We were searching for a pair of jeans for Josh when a lady worker came up and asked Bobby and Josh to enter the look a like contest. After their picture was taken, it wasn’t long after when it was announced they won! They shared a twenty dollar gift certificate.

And Dad was the chief cook. Josh whispered to me once, “Dad can cook better than Ma but don’t tell her.” Bobby whipped up midnight snacks that were fit for a king. Josh loved his steaks.

Bobby worked evening shift so only talked to Josh on the phone after school. So the weekends were so important to them both. Josh often waited up for his dad or got up when Bobby gave him his midnight dose of corn starch just to see him. “Josh always had the porch light on for me. He never forgot.”

We took many family rides, never missed a fair and made a visit to the game farm every fall.

When I went to get my first guide dog, I had to stay in Columbus, Ohio for twenty eight days. Josh was only four but, Bobby took care of him and his corn starch the whole month. They drove up for a visit in the middle of my stay. We enjoyed a trip to the Columbus Zoo.

Different times Josh needed help with homework. This would be Dad’s job if he was home. Bobby was so proud when Joshua received his apprentice license for electrical, got his driver’s license, graduated high school and went on to electrical school.

“I felt true amazement and pride at Joshua’s musical talent,” Bobby said.

Josh grew up with his dad playing the guitar and banjo but just didn’t seem interested. Then one day when he was fourteen, he suddenly started asking Bobby how to play this song or how to get this cord. This was the beginning of a remarkable relationship.

Bobby was known for his music talent. People often asked if he’d give them lessons. He always said he wasn’t a teacher. I guess it was as natural for Josh as it was for his dad.

I can remember late night jam sessions after I’d go to bed. They both were night owls. I’d only object when they brought out the electric guitars. They were much too loud in the middle of the night.

Bobby’s love was bluegrass. But he liked about any music. Josh on the other hand loved the old rock but would patiently follow his dad on a bluegrass tune.

“I can’t play since Josh’s death. It just hurts too much to play alone and it isn’t the same,” Bobby told a friend. He couldn’t get over our loss.

A Love Story

It was on a sultry June day, the air scented with freshly cut hay, that it happened. I was at my grandpa’s West Virginia farm for a visit, and when I walked into his yard, I saw my uncle and another man bent over a tractor.

When that other man stood and turned, my breath caught in my throat. He was tall, dark and handsome—and young!

Awestruck kid that I was, I stared openly at him, butterflies rioting inside me. I was just 13 myself, but in that moment, I’d fallen in love.

Funny thing was, I’d known him—Bobby—my entire life, but it was as though I was seeing him then for the very first time. And since he also knew me, and knew that I was only 13, he treated me like a friend.

Bobby was 17 and already a master musician, able to play any string instrument he touched. He and my uncles would sit outside and play their music for hours, and I’d sit there entranced. There’s something about a music man that girls can’t resist. I was one of those girls.

That summer seemed to go by faster than any I’d known, and soon, it was time for us to return home to Ohio. Time and distance did nothing to fade my attraction for the man who now haunted my dreams. I didn’t pay a moment’s attention to boys my age. They weren’t who I wanted.

When I turned 14, my parents divorced and my mom, sister and I moved to West Virginia. I’d undergone a great deal of physical changes since the summer, and when Bobby saw me again, it was a young woman he saw. I’d gone from being a long-legged kid to a girl who could’ve easily passed for 18.

By Memorial Day weekend of 1976, Bobby and I were a couple. Even now, when I hear the song “Strawberry Wine,” I’m reminded of that summer. We’d sneak out and walk along the river, or lay on our backs watching white clouds drift overhead while we talked. We were so innocent, and that summer was so special. Through the years, our relationship had both its wonderful times, and its difficult moments, but no matter how tough things were, we never called it quits.

After I graduated from high school, Bobby and I moved in together. I’d begun losing my eyesight from retinitis pigmentosa shortly before graduating, and even though Bobby knew from the start there were issues with my vision, the speed with which I went from sighted to blind was shocking for both of us, yet it did not change our relationship. Instead, they were times I’m convinced Bobby forgot I couldn’t see.

When I was 20 and Bobby 25, we moved onto a 300-acre piece of land that belonged to his family. It was across a river and very remote, with the nearest neighbor over a mile away. It was on the edge of wilderness. We loved that place, and when I think of it now, it seems like paradise.

Bobby loved everything to do with being outdoors. He hunted and fished, and enjoyed mowing and landscaping nearly as much. He was constantly planting flowers and shrugs, and in the spring, he and I would take walks in the woods to smell the wild apple and cherry blossoms, and sometimes hear turkeys gobbling.

Bobby had a definite green thumb. He planted our yard so full that I was sure it must resemble the Garden of Eden. One of my favorite flowerbeds was a circle he built with creek rock where we planted multi-colored cosmos. A wild plum tree’s blossoms by our driveway would perfume our front yard, and there was a small triangle where we planted nasturtiums.

When I was 26 and Bobby was 31, we decided to marry, and held our wedding outside under an indigo sky at a friend’s house. The weather that day was perfect, and we honeymooned at Seneca Rocks. Again an unforgettable time.

A year later, a bundle of joy entered our lives. It wasn’t just the two of us anymore. Joshua fit it perfectly. We adored him and we loved being parents.

My kind and gentle bear of a man had open-heart surgery a few years ago, and his nurses kept telling me what a sweetheart he was, how he never wanted to impose on anyone. His heart survived the surgery, but it couldn’t survive the loss of our son. After Josh died at 19, Bobby followed soon after.

Our love story was over.

He was a country boy
He was a music man
He loved nature
Loved the mountains and the land
I was a city girl
I loved to write
And I loved that gentle musician
Who fulfilled my life.

Bobby Conrad -- June 27, 1957 ~ September 20, 2009

Bobby Eugene Conrad died at home on September 20, 2009. He was born in Sutton on June 27, 1957. He is survived by his wife Rebecca Anne Willians Conrad, his mother, Avis Conrad and Father Harry Brown. He’s prceeded in death by his only son, Joshua Adam Conrad, his maternal grandparents, Cleve and Isa Conrad and paternal grandparents Wesly and Jane Brown.

Bobby worked at many jobs from Penline, Asplundh, Department of Highways, a cowork owner of a greenhouse/nursery, and was currently employed by Precision Services.

He loved the outdoors to hunting, fishing, to gardening. His real love was flowers. He was one of the most talented musician around. He could play anything with strings. He was loved by all and will be missed by so many.